


Where was Cora anyway?

by elizabeth_rice



Series: Teen Wolf Seasons 3A and 3B: Missing Scenes [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Canon - TV, Crack, Episode Tag, Mid-Canon, Season/Series 03, Short, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-14
Updated: 2013-07-14
Packaged: 2017-12-20 04:15:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/882834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elizabeth_rice/pseuds/elizabeth_rice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A crack version of the Dennifer scene in episode 306.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where was Cora anyway?

Derek's eyes are closed as he pants, his body is wracked with pain.

"Please don't die, my love. How will I live without thee?" Jennifer pleads softly.

Derek opens his eyes and looks at her. "You could follow me and we'll be together forever."

But Jennifer starts speaking over him. "But do not fret, my love. I shall be brave and live on. And I will not be alone (long). I shall console myself in the arms of the lovely Marin Morrell."

Derek frowns. Morrell? Isn't she the school's hot guidance counselor? "No, Jennifer, I told you everyone around me gets hurt. They die. You have to stick with the theme. And you can't have girl-on-girl action without me there to watch."

Jennifer smiles and bestows a sweet kiss on Derek's lips. She says, "My love, I already have. Now please, try not to interrupt my moving farewell speech. We didn't know each other long, but I shall always remember you fondly. Our time was short and sweet and kinda gross, but that's okay. It's not your fault you're always covered in blood everytime we meet."

"Jennifer--"

Jennifer leans down to kiss him again. "Goodbye, my love. You will always have a special place in my heart. Now I best be gone before your sweet baby sister returns home."

"Jennifer!"

Jennifer turns to look at him again. "Now that I think about it, she's like you, isn't she? _She_ would know what to do right now. Hm."

Derek shuts up feeling glum. Where _was_ Cora anyway?

Jennifer walks away. The door opens and closes with a loud bang.

"..."

Derek wipes his hand on his jeans, but the blood has dried. He digs his cellphone out of his pocket and makes a call.

"Stiles? I need you to come to the loft ASAP. Yes, I'm alive. (Barely.) No, it's-- Alright, it's bad. But I promise not to force you to chop off my arm or threaten to rip your throat out with my teeth."

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. I'm 97% certain Jeff Davis was referencing fandom in this scene, so I didn't shed any tears because the Dennifer scenes were outrageously hilarious.
> 
> 2\. Morrell/Jennifer has become my favourite femslash pairing. And because today's International Day of Femslash, I posted a story about them [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/882799). 
> 
> 3\. Does anyone know which scene Dylan co-wrote with Jeff?


End file.
